From Mandalay To Yangon

On Friday me and Axel took the bus from Mandalay to Bagan. This time there was only the one breakdown - quite a result! Bagan is a vast complex of ancient temples and is often regarded as a highlight of the country! On Saturday we visited the most popular structures by horse and carriage - a slightly surreal but popular way of exploring the area.

Thanks to the efforts of Rambo the horse, I found the temples interesting, if less spectacular than those at Angkor. There are some great views though as temple after temple spans into the distance. Our favourite temple was climbable, and Axel put safety aside as he shimmied around the uppermost rim of the ancient structure.

We would have probably decided to move on from Bagan on Saturday, but Rambo's owner gave us some exciting news - the circus was in town! We therefore had the laziest day ever on Saturday as we waited to see what would happen in a Burmese all night circus performance. Anticipation built as the day drew on, and the terrifying roar we heard as we neared the location of the circus only added to our excitement. At first we thought it was a lion, and as we both turned around and gazed into the drizzle drenched darkness behind us, we both expected to see a set of rapidly approaching eyes and claws! When we heard the roar a second time, we concluded it was just a very angry sounding elephant - and probably one that was tied up. Disappointment was just around the corner, however. After struggling to find the circus, we asked a local where it was - and we were duly informed that the circus had been rained off! Only in Myanmar could a little rain cancel an event in a tent!

The day had been wasted, but my time travelling has taught me that there are people in the world with much bigger problems than spending the occasional wasted day on a 365 day trip. In theory we could have waited another day in the hope of catching the following day's circus, but with bus breakdowns so common, we decided to aim for an early arrival in Yangon to ensure we did not miss our flight on Wednesday.

As it turned out, we arrived in Yangon with plenty of time. Not only did we have our first long distance Myanmar journey without a breakdown, but our driver thought he was Michael Schumacher! I've experienced a fair few scary bus rides in Vietnam and Cambodia, but this guy was crazy - especially compared to the usual calm Burmese bus drivers from our previous rides. We had high-speed dips, tyre-testing bends, one near collision with a lorry, and a sharp emergency stop before a collapsed tree. When the bus finally arrived in Yangon (much earlier than planned!) it was a relief that we were still alive!

With little else on our to-do list, me and Axel have struggled to occupy our time on our final full day in Myanmar. In fact the highlight of the day has been joining some young locals in a modern day popular pastime - the video game Counterstrike!

Overall, Myanmar has been a great experience - but the words of a guy we met in Bangkok have stayed with us for the entire journey; "Leave all logic behind at Bangkok airport". Myanmar is the country where right-hand drive vehicles are driven in the right hand lane. Myanmar is the country with a 45 Kyat denomination note (with a picture of a half-naked man in a spacesuit). Myanmar is the country where the largest denomination note - the 750 Kyat - was declared as defunct overnight, totally bankrupting millions of people. Myanmar is the country where motorbikes are banned in Yangon, cos someone on a motorbike once shaped his hand into a gun like shape and aimed it a General. And after playing Burmese Stroke for our entire journey, we finally were informed today that playing cards, even for fun, is illegal.

Tomorrow me and Axel fly back to Bangkok. Assuming I can get my debit card up and running again, I shall join Axel in a farewell night out, and then make my way all the way down to Malaysia. I haven't given myself long for this section of my journey though - I plan to be in Australia just a week later - something I have put zero thought into thus far! South-East Asia is closing to an end.

From Kalaw to Mandalay

On Thursday the trek from Kalaw to Inle Lake began. Our guide was Jimmy, a local who has been running treks for seventeen years. Much of the trek was pleasant with some great scenery and some very friendly villages. As usual, the local kids were always willing to greet the passing white faces, although strangely the kids here tended to shout 'Bye bye' rather than 'hello'. Nevertheless they were happy to take some of our free sweets.

Parts of the trek, however, got slightly slippery, and it was half way on the first day when the ground went from beneath my feet and I thumped to the floor in a Laurel & Hardy style collapse. Luckily the mud that loosened my footing made for an equally cushioned landing.

Thursday night was spent in a village home-stay. By now I was beginning to struggle, but it wasn't my tired legs that was the problem. As Axel is vegetarian, our food was non-meat. This proved very difficult for my carnivorous belly.

The second day of the trek involved less rain but more walking. This was really tiring. The evening was spent sleeping in a monastery where the young monks watched very loud TV until late, and then woke up to pray at 5AM. Somehow I managed to stay asleep though.

The final day of trekking got extremely wet and slippery. Me and Axel both slipped over twice. By the time we got onto a boat across Inle Lake, I was far too tired and cold to look up and admire the views, and I think we were both happy to finally get to the guesthouse. The next two days, therefore, were two very lazy days. Exhausted from the previous week's activities, our time was spent eating, sleeping and twisting round a card game Axel knew into our very own game; we call it Burmese Stroke With Extra Panic, and we expect it to take over the world.

Our final day at Inle Lake actually involved visiting the sights on offer. We hired a boatman and visited some handicraft shops, a monastery and a pagoda. That evening we boarded the night bus to Mandalay - and despite yet another night-time hillside breakdown, we arrived in the morning in one piece. After a walk around the city in the daytime, we travelled to see the Moustache Brothers in the evening. For the entire previous week, Axel had convinced me to match him and wear a moustache. This was partly to fulfil his dream of travelling around Myanmar as the Mario Brothers, but also it was for the benefit of tonight's show.

The Moustache brothers are a highly controversial trio of comedians in Myanmar. They have been arrested numerous times for their anti-government jokes, and now are banned from performing outside of their home. However, due to their popularity with tourists, they continue to perform at home and attempt to spread the word about Myanmar. When we arrived at the show, we were the only tourists there. However, our taxi driver had temporarily disappeared, so we returned to the house and baffled the Moustache Brothers' family with a frantic game of Burmese Stroke. Then to everyone's joy, a group of four Brazilian tourists arrived, and the show began.

In truth, the show and the jokes were not that great - but the intimate atmosphere of the tiny living room performance, the prestige of the showman, and the sheer guts of the three men to perform after many years of arrest and forced labour, helped the jokes and funny dances to gleam ten times brighter than they should have done. The act has needed to be altered from Burmese to English - quite a hindrance due to the fact that only one of the brothers speaks English! However, the English rolled off the tongue of Lu Maw at a very speedy pace, and he constantly used various English slang terms and phrases. Axel admitted to understanding very little, and some of the Brazilians to my left were stunned into total bemusement for the full hour. However, Lu Maw's grasp of the English language has to be admired; Before the show started I asked him if there was a toilet, to which he replied "You need to take a leak?".

The show was probably my highlight of Myanmar so far. As me and Axel pass the halfway point of our Burmese journey, however, it's strange to look back. There is little that really sticks in the mind from our travels here - but at the same time, Myanmar feels like my favourite country I have visited so far. While much of our time appears to have been spent trawling from pagoda to monastery to pagoda, it's the incredibly friendly nature of the people here which always make it a pleasure.

Today was spent visiting the sights of Mandalay and it's surrounding areas, and the heat made it particularly difficult, but again it was enjoyable. The locals always seem so happy to see us, and the atmosphere feels so peaceful.

From Bangkok to Kalaw

On Friday I took out a large chunk of Thai Baht to change into dollars. Once in Myanmar I could change this into the local currency. However, there are no ATM machines in Myanmar so I wanted to take out even more money. This seemed like a relatively simple task for Saturday morning before we got the flight, but unfortunately, it would prove far from simple. My bank appear to have blocked my account, most probably due to the sudden large withdrawal I made! Furthermore, after settling with the quantity of money I already had, I was struggling to find a bank that would change my existing Baht into Dollars. Once one finally opened, I was left almost penniless, so then I had to find another bank which would change one of my travellers cheques! By the time I met Axel to go to the airport, I was exhausted and hungry, but it was time to leave.

The rest of the day, however, was problem free, and before long we had touched down in Yangon and checked in to White House guesthouse. Under the searing heat, we spent our opening day wandering around the streets. The atmosphere of the city was amazing - both busy and chilled out at the same time. The ethnic mix of the locals was staggeringly varied, but the very friendly nature of the locals also was quickly apparent. It felt good to be in the heart of a place which so few people come to visit.

That evening me and Axel took a taxi to Mr Guitar - a bar we'd been recommended by someone we met in Bangkok. It was a very western style place, but solely populated by locals. I ordered a cheeseburger, but somewhere along the way Mr Guitar seems to have misunderstood the interpretation of a cheese burger. The 'burger' part of my meal simply comprised of a piece of sliced cheese - so basically my meal was cheese in bread. Axel's potato burger was equally bizarre. When Mr Guitar closed, we asked a taxi driver what our options were, and we ended up in a very bizarre club. Once again it was very western - but after a series of what were presumably prostitutes continued to hassle us, we very quickly got out.

The following morning we decided to book a bus ticket for the long journey north to Inle lake, but unfortunately we were too late; the bus was full. We therefore took a two hour trip to Bago. After checking in to San Francisco guesthouse, we once again attempted to buy a bus ticket north, this time one day in advance. However, we were once again too late. We therefore bought a ticket for Tuesday, and pondered on how we would spend our time in Bago. We soon met a couple of motorbike drivers who were offering a tour around the city; something we kept in mind.

We decided to take an early night on Sunday. However, whilst reading in our room we were interrupted by a knock at the door. It was two sons who lived in the guesthouse. One of them was repeating something to us over and over, but we failed to understand him. Again he repeated the word, but to no avail. After a short while longer, he picked up some shower gel which Axel had left on the table. "You want some shower gel?" I asked. The word he was repeating then became clearer - "Present? ... Present?". Axel however was not willing to hand away his only ticket to not smelling bad in a very hot and sweaty city. The boys left, but minutes later they knocked on the door once more. "Present ... Present?" he continued to ask, this time holding a small bowl. This time he got what he wished, but as Axel filled the bowl we couldn't help feeling bemused by the experience - was paying the family for our stay not sufficient?

As it turns out, maybe we actually paid the family too much! Sunday night was very long and hard. Our room was exceptionally hot, and with the open balcony door it was extremely noisy. Things got worse, however. I found myself getting quite itchy - presumably a few mosquito bites. After applying some cream to the bites, I returned to bed. The itchiness, however, appeared to be spreading. It took me about two hours until I made my conclusion - the bed had bed bugs. I spent the rest of the night sleeping on the floor - and in much more comfort. The multitude of red rashes on my body the next morning only confirmed my theory. I had no intentions of staying there another night.

At breakfast we once again met the two motorbike taxi drivers. They were extremely friendly and recommended a new place to stay. We accepted a lift there, and it was a huge improvement. Before long, therefore, we made another deal - we accepted the motorbike guide through Bago.

Bago is full of Buddhist temples, statues and monasteries. This was not something either me or Axel were particularly interested in, but there was little else to do. As it turns out, the day was excellent. The huge ninety-five metre leaning Buddha was particularly impressive.

At one point we arrived at a fairly small temple area. Me and Axel were fascinated by the building technique on a nearby building site- the builders were single handedly lobbing bricks up to the first floor, and subsequently catching them. As I watched for a few extra seconds, I soon followed Axel and one of our guides into a room. In the room was a statue of a woman wrapped in a huge snake. However, I was confused; Axel seemed very edgy - he was acting as if the snake was real. I tried mumbling to Axel why he was acting so strange, but kind of felt embarrassed to ask such a stupid question as 'Is the snake real?' ... and then the snake's head moved. I practically shed my skin. The snake was huge and incredibly fat. I just didn't think that they would have a real snake just wrapped there! The story goes that ten years ago the snake came to the complex. That night, a monk had a dream that the snake was the reincarnation of a woman, and thus the statue was built and the snake was kept in the compound, fed with the occasional chicken. I remained in the room for a while, mesmerised by the beast.

After such a great tour we invited our guides to join us at a bar in the evening. As with everybody in Myanmar, they were so friendly, and very happy that people were coming to visit them and their country. There are possibly a few Burmese, however, who feel differently. A drunk man approached me, lightly squeezed my arm, and spoke. "Are you ashamed?" came a deep gruff voice. "No" I replied, turning away back to the table. The man squeezed my arm again, and left. What he meant, I don't know - but it was probably the alcohol talking. Axel revealed to me later that the man had been lingering behind me for a while, and Axel began to grasp his glass tightly as a form of defence. Luckily, the man had moved on fast.

That evening we went to Super Top bar at the recommendation of our guides. It was a very odd place once again - but the food was good. This is something that has really stunned me about Myanmar. I had been told the food was not great, but so far it's been really amazing; my favourite food in South East Asia.

The following day was spent on a very long bus trip north to Kalaw. The bus broke down twice. The first time we broke down, huge bellows of smoke emerged outside, and then inside. However, it was just the air-conditioning that was failing. This meant for a very warm ride. Later on, a tyre went flat on a hillside road at night. However, me and Axel are now in lovely Kalaw, and tomorrow we begin a three day trek to Inle Lake.

I will close this blog entry with a story which one of our motor-bike guides suddenly told us at a Bago pagoda.

A Buddhist man was drowning in the sea. As wave after wave crashed upon him, he knew he was going to die. He did what he only could - he spoke to Buddha. "Buddha", exclaimed the man, "Please save me!". "I'm afraid I can't" replied Buddha. "Your fate is dictated by karma, and your karma is bad." And the man drowned that night.

The following night, a Christian man was drowning in the sea. As wave after wave crashed upon him, he knew he was going to die. He did what he only could - he spoke to Jesus. "Jesus", exclaimed the man, "Please save me!". "I'm afraid I can't" replied Jesus. "Can't you see? I'm nailed to a cross".

And there the story ended.

I'm not quite sure why this story tickled me and Axel so much, but it did. Maybe it was just so unexpected.

Ko Phi Phi and Bangkok (again!)

I remember being on the boat to Ko Phi Phi a week ago. I wasn't quite sure why I was there. I wondered why I was even bothering to go to an island which would hold no interest to me.

It's now a week later, and I can safely say that Ko Phi Phi will stay in my memory for a very long time! Being in a dorm is so much fun, and I met so many great people. I had a really lazy and relaxed time on Ko Phi Phi - I did hardly any sight seeing at all. This is why it was so fun. I felt like I was living there rather than just visiting. As I hung in limbo waiting to finalise my plans with Axel, all I could do was relax and enjoy myself. Days and evenings were spent hanging out with Jen, Nick, Judith, Nina, AJ, Martin and many more. The only vague activity I did was a couple of strolls up to the viewpoint above the two main beaches - although on the second visit me, Jen and Nick got lost and had to be guided down in the dark by a local with a flashlight!

As always with travelling, people soon moved on, and I too had plans. Me and Axel are going to Burma - and soon. On Tuesday me and Jen caught the boat back to Krabi - and despite almost being blown off the boat by a strong gust of wind and a flighty guitar, the next step of my journey had begun. On Wednesday I met Axel on a bus to Bangkok, and on Thursday we went to the Burmese Embassy to book our visas.

Upon arrival at the desk, we were given some bad news. We were hoping to get our visas that same day, but we were told we would have to wait until Tuesday. This would severely shorten our Burmese trip. We asked if there was any way to get it within one day, but we were told there wasn't. We enquired about an express option for a higher price, but again the response was negative. Puppy eyed and solemnly voiced, me and Axel began to discuss our options at the counter. None of these options seemed desirable. I enquired yet again if we could get our visa within the day - unsure as to why I even bothered - and in a complete flat and emotionless voice, the visa man suddenly accepted. Totally baffled, me and Axel handed over our money. By the afternoon we had our visas. By the evening, we had a flight booked for Saturday.

Today we make our last minute preparations. Our visit to Burma (or Myanmar as it is now officially known) will last two and a half weeks. During this time I expect my blog to be out of bounds; the internet in Myanmar is heavily restricted. Nevertheless, I expect it to be a visit of a lifetime.

From Chiaw Lan Lake to Ko Phi Phi

On Saturday I awoke early and rushed down some breakfast in preparation for a trip to Khao Sok's Chiaw Lan Lake. My group on the trip were really friendly. I got on well with Elly and Jordon from Manchester and Carla from Canada. A couple of retired Dutch people added some diversity to the group.

The lake was really gorgeous and relaxing. The boat ride to our rooms was really nice, although the faster our small boat went, the more water splashed over us. Eventually we arrived at our accommodation; floating shacks overlooking the water. Thick forest encircled the water's edge.

Before long we began the short trek to a nearby cave. I had been warned that there was a small swim inside the cave, and taking safety first I eventually decided to look like a wally and bring a life jacket along with me. However, it was probably not necessary; the swim was short and there was a rope to drag ourselves along. This was followed by a short but quite dangerous climb up some rocks - something that we should have probably been warned about and which the Dutch couple found slightly challenging. The trek and the cave were really amazing though. Shallow water gushed through the cave, and some sections were inhabited by large groups of bats, not to mention the occasional large spider.

That evening we went on a boat ride around the lake in the hope of spotting some wild animals, but none were seen. In the morning, after being woken up by the hooting of gibbons, we went on the animal hunt again. This was much more successful, and distant troupes of monkeys could be spotted high in the trees, occasionally making death-defying jumps from branch to branch. The haunting high-pitched hoots and squeals were a sound not easily forgotten. Overall it was a great trip, and the national park was a real highlight of Thailand.

The following day I arrived in Krabi. My original intention had been to move on immediately to Ton Sai to do some rock climbing, but Elly from the lake had recommended Krabi's Tiger Temple. Over 1200 steps up a limestone cliff, a Buddhist temple lies. However, it is the incredible views and the sheer feeling of achievement that made the climb worthwhile. Having said that, having scaled various challenging hills, towers and mountains on my travels, this one was particular gruelling, if relatively short-lived.

One day was enough for Krabi though, as nice as it was, and I soon made my way to Ton Sai beach. I had a very lazy first day there, mainly starting my new book - 'The Life Of Pi'. Part 1, however, failed to inspire me. I spent the evening enquiring about the best company to do rock climbing with - and it was Mr Pancake (who just happens to make incredible banana and chocolate pancakes) who recommended the long-standing climbing firm 'Wee Climbing'.

By the following afternoon, therefore, me and fellow rookie climber Lawrence were hooked up and standing at the foot of a limestone cliff. Various other groups from other climbing companies also huddled around the base. Lawrence had climbed once before, and so I let him go first. He scaled the cliff face like Spiderman, really putting the pressure on me!

When it was my turn to go, I didn't feel too scared. However, it very quickly got tough. Finding a nook or cranny for each hand and foot seemed very difficult, and despite the safety rope I had a constant desperate urge to continue clinging on for dear life; I hadn't yet had a chance to test if my safety rope actually worked (which of course it did!). At approximately the halfway stage, three words entered my mind; 'I'm giving up'. I felt stuck and unsure how to proceed. However, I never brought my thoughts to the surface, and with the guidance of our guide on the ground, I finally managed to get to the top. I looked down - I seemed very high up considering it was my very first climb - maybe ten or twelve metres.

Once I abseiled to the bottom it was a relief to touch the ground. Lawrence asked me if I felt the adrenaline. "Actually", I replied, "No!". I hadn't actually enjoyed the experience. Furthermore, when I looked up to the point I had reached from the ground, it really did not look high at all! It was only six metres - but from the top it looked double that!

After watching Lawrence speed up a second and higher route, it was my turn again. However, I once again felt stuck early on and uncomfortable. This time my thoughts turned to words and I quickly returned to the ground. I was surprised at how mentally tough I was finding rock-climbing.

By the time I was up the wall for the third time, there was a much bigger audience below me. Halfway, the three words returned to my head once more. "I can't do it" I stated to the onlookers. "Yes you can!" Came the united cry from below. As an image of Bob The Builder suddenly popped into my head, the crowd below gave me an urge to carry on. I eventually found a stance to enable me to clamber up further, and then further, and yet further still. Finally I reached the top - and to huge applause. Once I reached the bottom, I realised that I possibly had enjoyed some of that climb - possibly.

The climb had drained me and my forearms were beating. I felt neither mentally or physically enthusiastic about a fourth climb, but as Spiderman scaled to the lofty peak in under five minutes, I felt wrong to say no. However, just a few metres up my forearms were nagging and I felt uncomfortable. I gave in.

I'm glad I did rock-climbing, and possibly I'll try it again one day - but not for a while. I expected to find it a totally invigorating experience, but I largely found it quite the opposite.

That evening I booked a morning boat ticket to Ko Phi Phi, and walked over to a bar which, according to Lawrence, had a live band. I sat down at the bar and ordered a beer. To my right there was a guy by himself; 'probably the next person I'll be talking to' I thought. Next I looked left - and then I gasped. It was a long, slow and loud gasp. The gasp was so emphatic that the girl to my left turned to me and stared. The gasp was so emphatic that the guy to her left stopped talking to the barmaid and turned and stared. The barmaid turned and stared. Gasping was an unintentional and unorthodox way to react to what I saw, but it had been a totally natural reaction to the moment I suddenly found Axel.

Axel is the crazy, ultra-friendly, skateboarding, 1920's moustache-clad Swede who I had met in Pai just two weeks into my travels. At the time he suggested that we travel to Papa New Guinea together, but those plans fell silent. I remembered that Axel was leaving Pai to go south to do some rock climbing. What I didn't expect was that while I was travelling through three other countries, returning to Thailand, and heading south, Axel was spending this entire time on the very beach he travelled to after Pai. Apparently he'd not even done any rock-climbing, but he was training to be a dive instructor.

After spending the night reminiscing about Pai and our travels (or lack of them), the idea of travelling together once more came up. Coincidently, Axel had recently been considering travelling to Burma, and my unexpected appearance on Ton Sai appeared to give him the impetus to put the plan into action. However, I had already booked my boat for my next destination, and Axel needed to see if he could end his diving course soon. Only time will tell - but Burma is apparently amazing and it would be a great opportunity.

Yesterday, as I left thoughts of Burma and Axel on the back-burner, I arrived in Ko Phi Phi. It's not a place I particularly expected to like - it's a beautiful island that has been completely overrun by a loud and boisterous tourist community. However, it's also famous for nearby island Ko Phi Phi Lai, which is where the film 'The Beach' was filmed. This is something I wanted to see. Sometimes if you have low expectations of a place, it ends up being okay. It can't be as bad as you think. I think this is why my first 24 hours on Ko Phi Phi have been quite good. I spent my first few hours on the island just reading 'Life of Pi', and subsequently trekking to the nearby viewpoint to get a great view of the sun setting over Ko Phi Phi's twin beaches. This was followed by a good night out - helped largely by the fact that I am staying in a dormitory and therefore you automatically have people to go out with.

Today I will probably go to Ko Phi Phi Lai - but I also await an e-mail from Axel. If I do not hear from him by the morning, it may be difficult to decide whether I should continue to head south or not.